This is mostly copied from my reply to another comment:
Parents get tired. In fact, most parents have chronic levels of sleep deprivation which impairs things like concentration, reflexes, ability to pay attention, etc. Then you have parents who might be working multiple jobs, be dealing with health issues that affect sleep, etc. A leash would make that job to keep kids safe much easier.
No leash equals a non-abusive, even though not every situation can allow a parent to keep 100% focus on the child, but using a leash the parent suddenly becomes abusive?
Should a parent not give the kid a helmet when learning to ride a bike then also? Does using a helmet mean the parent is abusive?
I just don’t understand this. I cannot fathom that someone would criticize a thing that objectively and provably make life in the world safer for children. It’s just another tool to help kids get to grow up.
There are countless stories of children just walking away in the 3 to 5 seconds a parent looks away where the child falls off a height, falls into water (not every parent can swim, and not all waters are swimable), gets picked up by a stranger in a crowd, etc. Situations that a leash would 100% have saved the child’s life.
And when these people are confronted on why it’s abusive or “embarrassing for the child”, they don’t have an answer.
They might say something out of left field like “children aren’t dogs!”, to which I say “yes, you’re right. Children aren’t dogs. Very good! Now about the leash, why is it abusive?”
I’ve never broken a bone, but I did get a dislocated elbow once when I was quite young, maybe 2 or 3. I was a dumb stubborn kid who threw a tantrum in the middle of a street and my mom had to grab me by the arm and drag me to safety. I fought her so hard I dislocated my elbow. I’m not sure if a leash would have made that situation more manageable, but I wouldn’t have blamed my parents for trying it. Sometimes kids go through a feral animal phase and you just have to deal with it however you can.
Yup, that’s called nurse maid’s elbow. It’s incredibly common. It’s almost always caused by a kid trying to yank themselves away. And it happens because at that young the tendons aren’t strong enough to hold that amount of weight/tension.
Not true, my son got nurse maid’s elbow. He was crying almost non-stop for 5 hours between it happening to the doctor walking into the doctor’s room. The instant the doctor manipulated his arm he stopped crying and it was like nothing happened.
I grew up with my father working night shifts and my mother being tired all the time, I didn’t need a leash.
Children are a lot more capable and resilient if you give them the chance to be, and insulating them from small forms of possible harm doesn’t help their development.
Now I am not saying “let your toddler run around a highway” but if you pick a reasonable place for your child to play there’s no need for a fucking leash 99% of the time.
Children are people, don’t make them wear diapers! They can pee anywhere they want!
Children are people! Don’t limit their screen time! If you just give them plenty of toys, they will be capable of limiting their own screen time!
Children are people! They are resilient! Let them watch R-rated films and have unfettered access to the Internet!
No one is talking about putting a leash on an eight year old. We’re talking about letting a 14 month old get to experience the privilege of walking in a public place rather than being trapped on Mom’s hip or in a stroller.
Very good! I’d give you a sticker, but I don’t know where you live.
insulating them from small forms of possible harm doesn’t help their development.
And a leash doesn’t do that. Being a hover parent does.
if you pick a reasonable place for your child to play there’s no need for a fucking leash 99% of the time.
What? Is that how you people think using a leash works? You think a leash is put on the child in the morning and isn’t taken off until the end of the day? Are you for real with that? Forget it, you don’t get a sticker for saying the dumbest thing I’ve heard today. And I’ve already watched a video about a flat earther.
I am reflecting on my own parenting. I see possible benefits of a leash.
We’ve never used a leash. Instead I do a lot of yelling / stern vocalizations to keep kids away from areas they shouldn’t be. My approach is fraught with negative side effects because I often come off as angry, and my spouse and I work on checking me if it gets to be too much.
A leash could be a good alternative, or just an additional option to incorporate. It’s food for thought.
This is mostly copied from my reply to another comment:
Parents get tired. In fact, most parents have chronic levels of sleep deprivation which impairs things like concentration, reflexes, ability to pay attention, etc. Then you have parents who might be working multiple jobs, be dealing with health issues that affect sleep, etc. A leash would make that job to keep kids safe much easier.
No leash equals a non-abusive, even though not every situation can allow a parent to keep 100% focus on the child, but using a leash the parent suddenly becomes abusive?
Should a parent not give the kid a helmet when learning to ride a bike then also? Does using a helmet mean the parent is abusive?
I just don’t understand this. I cannot fathom that someone would criticize a thing that objectively and provably make life in the world safer for children. It’s just another tool to help kids get to grow up.
There are countless stories of children just walking away in the 3 to 5 seconds a parent looks away where the child falls off a height, falls into water (not every parent can swim, and not all waters are swimable), gets picked up by a stranger in a crowd, etc. Situations that a leash would 100% have saved the child’s life.
And when these people are confronted on why it’s abusive or “embarrassing for the child”, they don’t have an answer.
They might say something out of left field like “children aren’t dogs!”, to which I say “yes, you’re right. Children aren’t dogs. Very good! Now about the leash, why is it abusive?”
I used to run into traffic when I was a kid, so my mom put me on a leash.
Still never been hit by a car, so overall I think it was a good call. I don’t feel degraded by it.
Good on your mom! And glad you were safe!
I’ve never broken a bone, but I did get a dislocated elbow once when I was quite young, maybe 2 or 3. I was a dumb stubborn kid who threw a tantrum in the middle of a street and my mom had to grab me by the arm and drag me to safety. I fought her so hard I dislocated my elbow. I’m not sure if a leash would have made that situation more manageable, but I wouldn’t have blamed my parents for trying it. Sometimes kids go through a feral animal phase and you just have to deal with it however you can.
Yup, that’s called nurse maid’s elbow. It’s incredibly common. It’s almost always caused by a kid trying to yank themselves away. And it happens because at that young the tendons aren’t strong enough to hold that amount of weight/tension.
And putting it back is an easy process, if you know how to do it. Pain almost immediately goes away, though they need to be in a sling.
Not true, my son got nurse maid’s elbow. He was crying almost non-stop for 5 hours between it happening to the doctor walking into the doctor’s room. The instant the doctor manipulated his arm he stopped crying and it was like nothing happened.
Typically, the sling is to reduce the chance of repeat injury, not for pain.
Well according to the doc that’s not a concern unless the same force is applied again.
I’ve taken care of too many toddlers, I guess to trust that.
But I have taken care of too many toddlers to trust that they keep it on consistently, as well.
Counterpoint: children are people
I grew up with my father working night shifts and my mother being tired all the time, I didn’t need a leash.
Children are a lot more capable and resilient if you give them the chance to be, and insulating them from small forms of possible harm doesn’t help their development.
Now I am not saying “let your toddler run around a highway” but if you pick a reasonable place for your child to play there’s no need for a fucking leash 99% of the time.
That’s not a great take.
Children are people, don’t make them wear diapers! They can pee anywhere they want!
Children are people! Don’t limit their screen time! If you just give them plenty of toys, they will be capable of limiting their own screen time!
Children are people! They are resilient! Let them watch R-rated films and have unfettered access to the Internet!
No one is talking about putting a leash on an eight year old. We’re talking about letting a 14 month old get to experience the privilege of walking in a public place rather than being trapped on Mom’s hip or in a stroller.
Very good! I’d give you a sticker, but I don’t know where you live.
And a leash doesn’t do that. Being a hover parent does.
What? Is that how you people think using a leash works? You think a leash is put on the child in the morning and isn’t taken off until the end of the day? Are you for real with that? Forget it, you don’t get a sticker for saying the dumbest thing I’ve heard today. And I’ve already watched a video about a flat earther.
You are absolutely insane and a lazy ass parent lmfao
Learning’s hard, eh?
Parents don’t have the HoW dArE YoU tElL mE wHaT I dO tO mY cHiLd Is ShItTy attitude challenge
I think you were projecting with that “you’re insane” comment.
I have no idea what you’re trying to say this time. Maybe have a lie down?
I am reflecting on my own parenting. I see possible benefits of a leash.
We’ve never used a leash. Instead I do a lot of yelling / stern vocalizations to keep kids away from areas they shouldn’t be. My approach is fraught with negative side effects because I often come off as angry, and my spouse and I work on checking me if it gets to be too much.
A leash could be a good alternative, or just an additional option to incorporate. It’s food for thought.
It’s a natural instinct to convey urgency of danger. It works for adults but it can be damaging to kids.
The truth is that in a life or death situation, you do whatever you need to do to keep kids safe.