I’ve been dealing with my 85 year old uncle who recent fell and broke his hip again. I’ve learned the following:
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Physical exercise is important! My uncle could barely walk before, which is probably why he fell. While he was in the hospital he physically could not sit up on his own (no upper body strength) and now cant lift himself into/out of his wheelchair. I’ve decided to start working out more and focus on strength.
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Listen to your doctors!! After he broke his hip the first time, he refused to do physical therapy and would not use his cane. It’s obvious that both of these things would have helped prevent him from falling the second time.
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Be kind to the people around you! My uncle is narcissistic and insults friends/family when he gets comfortable with them. This meant that for most of his stay in the hospital, I was the only person who visited.
I think the problem is the girl not you. If you asked her politely, she said no, and then you backed down, there is no reason for her to bad mouth you to friends. I could understand maybe asking one trusted person for advice but spreading rumors through a friend group is a serious issue. Not just the girl but also the friends spreading the rumor. I think a lot of people are really bad at communicating and it leads to more issues. If she had simply talked to you about how she felt, I’m sure you both could have worked through it.