They search there often enough in prison, unfortunately.

It’s Texas, they’ve just been waiting to do it on the right week so they have something to distract from their worse politics

I’m hoping he announced the gaetz nomination to get him to resign, and it’s going to nominate someone else for reals (all over some perceived slight). I have nothing to base this off of, other than it would be funny.

“a hat comes with the cabinet position”

Please don’t tell my intrusive thoughts that

Did you check your pockets for a time machine? I bet you left it there and could make a quick pop back to the 90s and correct the timeline.

I’m not sure what you’d have to do to actually go to hell,

Be mormon, then say mormonism is false. It’s their only unforgivable sin.

My cat wants me to open the door for him. I humor him. So the other day he’s yowling like he’s got to poop and he’s turtling, and I jump out of my chair to rush him down the hall to the litter box. What does the little shit do? Jumps in my chair, lays down and farts at me.

I brought in another chair so I could work.

Can’t speak to now, but 30 years ago? Yeah.

the United States one is very funny

Not anymore at least

What if it was a legal contract killing? Like, uh, I don’t know, blessed by the pope or something

Politics under Clinton seem civil now

As is tradition

My dude, I’ve had a few friends abs roommates who are refugees. All I will say is that war is hell, and to invite it is madness.

Come on over, I’ll put on a pot of bear shit coffee and see if you disagree

I’ve been trying to fall asleep for, uh, well the first dose of nyquil just wore off. This is going to be a fun night.

This map shows a whole lot of fucking up.

Yeah, wtf is in the water out east?

Oh right, the lead

Okay I’ll learn how to make better coffee