Secretly thought and wished would never happen.

Secretly. Outwardly, though, apparently they were all “Woooo! Fire me, bitches! I can’t wait for this to happen, let’s do this!!”

“Mistakenly”

I’m not sure who you’re making fun of here…🤷‍♂️

Or did they…

Hopefully he reported this activity to his son, to keep him honest and appropriately guilty

“Mankind was completely unprepared…” - 5 years from now, probably

Has anyone brought up, in a serious, on the record way, that we are not at war, and the president doesn’t actually have tariff powers right now?

Hmm, but I very much want to get away with whatever thing we are discussing that I would never ever actually contemplate committing doing in real life.

Who can I direct to seek the death penalty for Pam Bondi?

Dear lord, we’re not going back to smoking in restaurants, are we?

Definitely an N-word!

Fingers crossed!

I feel like someone took the Necronomicon, and didn’t speak the three words correctly

What needs to be said is “Mr. President, I’d like you to meet U.S. Marshal Raylan Givens.”

You mean Republicans? Yeah they won’t allow that, silly

Goddamnit, Missouri Man! When will you learn?!

The literal name of the screensaver is “Macintosh”.

Specs:

Cheers!

The retro Mac screensaver in MacOS crashes like 97% of the time. I have confirmed it’s not just for me.

Also: Can you please ask someone to add the OpenDyslexic font to apple books?