Consumer! Do you desire … individuality? Of course you do. But that takes time, effort, reflection and experience to acquire! And who has time for that in /this/ economy?
Fret no more! Our line of mass produced clothes and accessories offer something -unique- for everyone!
Call today to be matched with a fashion specialist who is paid subsistence wage, in a foreign country, to talk to people all day and convince them to buy stupid bullshit!
Time is limited on this exclusive offer, so act now! Our bespoke fashionista gurus are standing by 24/7!
Call 1 800 FASHION now!
subject to terms and liability. offer does not apply in all states. please know your own inseam, waist size and all other relevant dimensions of your body before calling, operators are not responsible for incorrectly sized clothes, nor is our phone line quality sufficient for either you or the operator to understand 28% of spoken syllables.1800FASHION is not responsible if your purchased clothing and or accessories are lost or damaged in transit, independent of whether we even shipped them at all. WARNING some clothing and or accessories may contain lead, asbestos and or traces of nuts. 1800FASHION reserves the right to sue you for any emotional damages you may cause to our operators by becoming frustrated with our bullshit, but we wont use it to aid them in any way
Consumer! Do you desire … individuality? Of course you do. But that takes time, effort, reflection and experience to acquire! And who has time for that in /this/ economy?
Fret no more! Our line of mass produced clothes and accessories offer something -unique- for everyone!
Call today to be matched with a fashion specialist who is paid subsistence wage, in a foreign country, to talk to people all day and convince them to buy stupid bullshit!
Time is limited on this exclusive offer, so act now! Our bespoke fashionista gurus are standing by 24/7!
Call 1 800 FASHION now!
subject to terms and liability. offer does not apply in all states. please know your own inseam, waist size and all other relevant dimensions of your body before calling, operators are not responsible for incorrectly sized clothes, nor is our phone line quality sufficient for either you or the operator to understand 28% of spoken syllables.1800FASHION is not responsible if your purchased clothing and or accessories are lost or damaged in transit, independent of whether we even shipped them at all. WARNING some clothing and or accessories may contain lead, asbestos and or traces of nuts. 1800FASHION reserves the right to sue you for any emotional damages you may cause to our operators by becoming frustrated with our bullshit, but we wont use it to aid them in any way